fcukstancia

2007-08-08T16:14:00.000+08:00

blog

2007-06-18T22:18:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY BABY! ((((((: i love you. (: today was fun fun! ((:

2007-06-08T23:44:00.000+08:00

moved. ask me for add if you want. (:

2007-06-07T13:26:00.001+08:00

anyway happy seventh month boy! (:

2007-06-05T14:17:00.000+08:00

i cut my hair )): no more curls. ): anyway the tans are coming over for dinner tonight! (: haha not that many people since so many arent in singapore. anyway, the boy's passing out parade's on mon! (: they pushed it one day earlier. ((:

aiights, pics up here!
http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2091425122

2007-06-03T19:29:00.000+08:00

some photos here. anyway i think china's really nice. (: the scenery is nice. haha and i've been to the most number of lakes ranging from tai hu xi to a lot of others. i cant remember all the chinese names. and i've sat the most number of boats in the past 8 days. haha and i've seen the most number of chinese-looking buildings or infrastructure. but i've learnt a lot about chinese history and its kinda interesting with all the dynasty and all. and our tour guide was really good and really nice. (: there were also individual tour guides for the different towns and they're all damn funny and cute. (: haha. but when we were shopping, the shop keeper asked us where we were from and my mom said singapore. then she was like insulting my chinese and laughing at it cause she said my chinese "bu biao zhun" haha and we ended up buying lots of stuff from that shop. anyway the past few days in shanghai was the most fun cause we stayed at my aunt's house. and we shopped from morning and only came back at night. haha and the best thing was we had xiao xun, my aunt's driver and we didnt have to carry anything. haha and he's damn nice! we were late for the airport cause we shopped overtime and then he had to rush us to the airport. haha and when we reached, we were practically running to the counter and he had to help us carry our luggages which filled the whole back seat. anyway the past week was really fun and nice esp with mommy and grandma! (: and plus the first five days with our tour people! when we reached singapore, they kinda felt like family(: and there's claudia, the pretty little 6yr old girl (: anyway before going, i was dreading cause its china but i really enjoyed the past 8 days. (:

sis at the aiport. i miss her now. ): she's still in australia. )):
how i manage to kill time by watching 5 movies. (:

haha mommy suspects thats dog's meat.
one the many pagodas.
one of the many bridges. haha

san guo cheng!
grandma, mommy, aunt ((: our shopping guide!
haha on the way to the airport this was only half way through. and we were already late by then!

this was on the way to dinner. my two cute cousins! (: shawn and nigel.

mommy! ((: haha and our luggages all behind.
thats aunt's driver rushing us to the airport! (:
and then its back to this tiny island.

okay here are some photos. will put the rest up on image station.

2007-06-03T16:52:00.000+08:00

when we came home from church this morning, i realised that the basketball court and streetsoccer court is ready! (: they converted one part of the tennis court area to that! (: i think im gonna go play basketball with my bro later (: anyway, my cousin just came over and she brought dolly and dewey along! (: haha rover's scared of dewey even though he's twice his size. haha my dumb rover. ((: anyway the days ahead are filled with tuitions and more tuitions. and mommy's totally forthe idea. but luckily i have bernie! (: oh wells. anyway china trip pics are up soon! (: sheryl wee! we need to go out soon!

i just hope you'll care more. i dont mean to get angry all the time. love you.

2007-06-03T00:07:00.000+08:00

im back from the land of china! ((((((: and it was really really fun (((: updates later on cause im really tired. plane ride home was nice too! haha i watched 5 movies in all (: anyway the trip was really nice! i spent 5 days in hangzhou, wu zhen, wu xi, nanjing, suzhou and another 3 days in shanghai. (: haha and mummy loves prison break now. all thanks to me! (: she wanted to watch the whole season but there wasnt enough time.ahha but she doesnt like desperate housewives. anyway im tired now and gonna pack all the stuff i bought! (: aiights. till then! (:

2007-05-25T19:40:00.000+08:00

alrights, im off to the airport in awhile. will be back next saturday night. off to china with mommy and grandma. i hope it'll be fun! anyway the boy got confined. ))): dont know why though.hope he's fine! (: and aunt and cousin left for london this morning, my sister's leaving for australia tomorrow and uncle's going to shanghai too for business trip. looks like half the tans are overseas! anyway im missing the william a lot. )): alrights, im off to pack! ((: see you in about a week's time! (:

2007-05-23T13:06:00.000+08:00

i havent been here in a million years. haha anyway gp and chem spa ))))): sigh. i hope both goes well. but the good news is that william might book out on friday instead of sat so maybe i'll get to see him! (((: and then.. he gave me a surprise call last night cause he's supposed to be at field camp but he was sick so he could come back to his bunk! ((((: anyway yup, i think im going to camp at the conference room downstairs later to continue studying. alrights, doubt i'll be coming here for the next two weeks. till then. anyway random pics from the past two weeks with sheryl's birthday party and cousin's house warming party! (:

dewy! (((: bernie's new dog and rover's new friend! (:
sister and cousin! (:
bernie's new room! (: prettypretty!

2007-05-19T23:14:00.001+08:00

roars. im tired and sleepy but i dont feel like going to bed. walking home just now made me think a lot. its one of the emo days where thoughts keep coming back. oh wells. spiderman3 again with william and his bunk mates. yesterday was dinner with another group of them. and ben ee was there with them too! (: plus xizhen too. haha ben ee is hilarious! hahah laughing non stop at him the whole time. he's still the same! haha anyway gp exam on fri plus chem spa. and plus im leaving for china on the same day but midnight. oh gosh, i hope i pass through this whole week with ease cause things dont seem to be going smoothly. plus the next two weeks is going to be )): roars. aiyah whatever.goodnight all.

2007-05-14T20:51:00.000+08:00

a really eventful weekend! (: friday was spent going out with pam in the evening then it was off to pick the army boy up from pasir ris! (: hehe so exciting! they all looked so cute in their army uniform! ((: hahah they all looked like they were going to war when they came off the bus and trooped to the station. anyway, it was really really nice to see william again after two long weeks! (((: many smiles!(((: hehe. the long awaited arrival. haha and he was excited too! (: anyway, then he went home to change while i waited for him with pam and aly then they left when he came.oh we caught spiderman at midnight! (: then cabbed home. saturday was spent at sheryl's party! HAPPY BIRTHDAY AH WEE! (: but we were really late cause william picked shamir and me up only about 8 plus. anyway yup! after the party, the boy and i wanted to go liquid kitchen but it was so crowded so we drove around and then home! (: hehe love car rides with him! (: aiights, and mothers' day yesterday! (: the three of us plus daddy got mommy the osim upapa! haha it feels damn nice! (: alright, im waiting for friday again! (((:

2007-05-09T18:00:00.000+08:00

i havent been typing much here but anyway rover's going to the vet tomorrow to get sterilised. poor boy cause he's not going to be his usual hyper self for about a week till the wound heals. and its 2 days more! ((((:

2007-05-06T21:10:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 6 MONTHS BOY! (:

i know you're only going to read this when you come out on fri but anyway, 5 days more till you come out so we can't spend today together. ): but the call yesterday and the msg this morning at 5 something am made up for it somehow i guess. anyway happy 6 months! (: thank you for everything boy. (: even though nowadays i cant see you as often and only on weekends, but im glad that we can still talk on the phone every night. hehe thank you for always chionging to bathe first before everyone else so that you can call me and talk longer. ((: boy, the past 6 months have been filled with lovely memories. even though the start was rather trying, but im glad things are a whole lot better now. (: thank you for making my life much nicer. ((:

iloveyouboy.

2007-05-04T20:31:00.000+08:00

and so, the day ended nicely with a short council meeting of about 15 mins and the rest of the time was spent in the library with sher and bel. anyway sher+stalker=ultimatefun. (: haha thanks for the laughter sher, it made me smile a lot today.you better make peace with me because i've got lots of foolscape paper to scare and more markers. (: haha i dont know how school will be without you and even better, how council will be without you. on another hand, i miss cartel a lot. ): plus queen just sent me a message yesterday. cartel can we please meet up soon! (: annabel sharmaine shamir charmaine queen! (: aiights, im off to wait for the boy's call! ((: which is going to make me have a good night's sleep! ((: 7 more days till the boy's back! ((:

its funny how friendships still continue normally when things crop up. i dont know how it happens because somehow, i feel that the friendship isnt the same anymore. some say its because of these obstacles, disputes, misunderstandings, quarrels or whatever, that makes the friendship even stronger. but maybe it just appears to be so. maybe all these is just a facade. pretence i guess. what if forgiveness or reconciliation was never in the picture? oh wells. something random.

2007-05-01T17:44:00.000+08:00

the days are passing by faster than i imagined it to be. today was nice with lunch with my family (: then home. even though i couldnt meet amanda at gardens today to study cause tuition got cancelled , but staying at home was nice too. (: gardens with amanda last night was really fun! (: dinner at cartel added with our long awaited updates on whats happening in our lives was absolutely great, followed by dessert at ice cube and studied there too. and today was nice cause i received an email from my cousin in kuwait! (: hehe that made me smile! (: che feli come back soon! ((: aiights. today marks 10 days more! (((: and in a few hours, the call from tekong! (:

2007-04-30T16:59:00.000+08:00

the days pass so slowly. haha but im not depressed, dont worry! haha. cause this week's a short week! ((: plus im meeting amanda for dinner and studying session at her club later! ((: finally i get to meet her! (: days end really nicely cause the awaited phonecall comes in every night between 9.30 to 10.30 and even though the call cant last more than half an hour every night, but its good hearing that the boy's doing fine in there and hearing his voice makes me smile! (: 11 more days though! the only thing that im looking forward to besides the china trip, is going to pick the boy up next fri at pasir ris! ((((: hehe i get to see him in his army uniform! (: aiights, im off to get ready to meet amanda! (: lovessss. happy day plus i got to go out with pam, boon and christy. ((: till then! (:

2007-04-27T20:46:00.000+08:00

and the boy went in today to the island at 12.30pm ))): sad the whole day. ): buttttttt the happy thing that just made me smile is that the boy just msged me! (((: and he's in the same company as greg and claudio and in the same platoon as claudio! ((: and his bed is next to xizhen! (: haha bet aileen's gonna scream! anndddd i get to talk to the boy from 9.30 to 10.30 later! (((: aiights im happy now but missing him lots! alrights, im going to bathe and bring rover for a walk! till then! oh
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAM! (: hope you like your nano! ((: love you babe!

2007-04-26T11:20:00.001+08:00

alrights, didnt go to school today. anyway the boy is going in tomorrow to the little island )): and im awfully sad. ): but the times spent with him have been really nice nice! ((: no more sad days at all with this boy here. ((: i'll miss having supper at newton with him plus the many dinners we have together and many many more stuff but then again, i'll see him again after two weeks! which hopefully will pass faster than his US trip! and sher's going to make fun of me again, but im going to miss you boy! )): love you! alrights, pictures below.

okay these are the before-haircut picture!

hahah childish boy!
(((: loveyouboy
andddddddd the after-haircut pic! (: cute shaven boy! (:

unglam ar you!

alright, thats all. anyway im going to miss you ): why must there be army! haha anyway please take care in there and i'll see you in two weeks ya? loveyouboy (:

2007-04-22T16:25:00.001+08:00

im dreading the week ahead. )): haha but conversations between william sheryl and me never fail to make me laugh. sher's just hilarious! and she got banged! (: still make fun of me somemore la! you watch out ar sheryl wee shu li! but i still love you nonetheless sheryl wee! (: see la, still make fun of me and my msn nick! i will ask william to form tagteam with me then you know ar! he knows the four letter password anyway! ((((: " sian i **** *****! " you die ar!
anyway im loving the boy more each day! (: hehe. even though he's out playing soccer now! loves! (((: im a happy girl for now but not till friday! (: and i have a plan! nice nice plan. (:

msnbuddy/chubbybuddy #1

msnbuddy/chubbybuddy #2

2007-04-22T16:25:00.000+08:00

2007-04-21T13:51:00.000+08:00

the past week's been really good. wednesday was good with ikea with boon then william picked us up and off to acsi for rugby match and then dinner with william, gi, frans. anyway the boy can drive (((((((: hehe car ride was nice nice ((: esp the ride home (: alrights then caught turistas, signed up for driving and all. (: in all, i really enjoyed the times with the boy. (:

boy, thank you for what you said yesterday.
it really meant a lot (:
you always make me smile (:
no more angsty girl. (:
more car rides okay! (:
i love you.

2007-04-17T18:56:00.000+08:00

2.4 today was disastrous )))))): cannot get 30 points already )))): but island creamery with william, pam, boon and huixin after that was good good (: hehe. aiights. im tired now. this week's a good week although days are passing by really quickly ))))))): sian.

i love my grey ********* ((: do you too? hehe

2007-04-14T22:08:00.000+08:00

hahahahahhahahaahah omg talking to joel on msn makes me look like an idiot cause he makes me laugh like mad and im laughing the screen now.

2007-04-14T22:01:00.000+08:00

parent teacher meeting today was kinda funny. only mummy went cause daddy had meeting last minute. anyway mdm ban wants to move me away from my seat cause she says i talk too much and my attention span is too short )): haha i cant help it right. oh wells. anyway i suddenly miss my sister )): realise i havent been talking to her much these days cause its either im home late or she's home late and either of us are already sleeping. ): if you're reading this, i miss you che! ):

i've been deluding myself all along,
but now its really disappointment.

2007-04-12T17:19:00.000+08:00

rahh. today was just madness. woke up this morning, panicked and started studying econs. and the day was so long. ): but im glad its over.
i think im getting back on track. i've found my aim, my goal. and im going to achieve it no matter what. oh wells. after all, that piece of paper means so much.

on another note which made me a less angsty person was that ROVER PEEed ON MY BAG! even though he does annoying stuff like these, but looking at him makes me smile (: i love rover! (:

2007-04-10T22:51:00.000+08:00

insecure.actions speaks louder.
im really tired.trust no more.

2007-04-09T22:03:00.000+08:00

So here we are face to face
And heart to heart
I want you to know we will
Never be apart
Now I believe that wishes can come true
Cause I see my whole world
I see only you

2007-04-08T20:45:00.000+08:00

a really boring sunday and boring easter cause my family didnt go for mass with the rest of the tans. went for 7am mass instead cause bro has tournament again today. on a brighter note, he's been winning! (: he won again today so he's playing on tues! (: kudos to my bro (: aiights, someone's going class outing.):

2007-04-07T11:46:00.000+08:00

tuition early in the morning at 8 am is just crazy.on another note, the number 23 is a good movie! (: haha kept me alert throughout the whole show(: yesterday was good despite us not able to watch 300 cause i was late. :/ hehe sorry boy! plus nice dinner too (: oh wells, and i need to study today but maybe i'll go with my mommy to watch my brother at his tennis tournament later. (:

2007-04-07T01:03:00.000+08:00

happy fifth month boy. (:
with much love...

2007-04-05T23:36:00.000+08:00

and so after two days, i finally went back to school. nice seeing my classmates again. (: and town with pam bel and christy after school. (:
went for maundy thurs mass with the tans. (: and then church visitation in our own bus! (: dinner on board plus nice company (: i just love family outings like these. anyway mass today was exceptionally meaningful to me, i dont know why. i guess i have been drifting away from God. and today was all about love and humility.and forgiveness. (: it taught me many things. and going to each church to pray today made me reflect on everything and im glad there was today for me to pray. cause i really did. and i havent done so in quite a long time. (: i prayed for many things and each church i went to, i had a different topic to pray on and one of them was to love and be humble.

today's the first time i tried and even though i failed,
im glad i tried.
today's a day of forgiveness. every day it shall be. (:

2007-04-04T23:01:00.000+08:00

and the boy has finally returned! ((((((((((((((((:

2007-04-03T15:01:00.000+08:00

i wanna go back to the good old days, where worries were kept simple and easy to solve. as we grow older year by year, it seems life gets more complicated or rather, we make it complicated. maybe if all of us were like algernon in flowers for algernon, we would be happier people. we are the cause, the reason why we think our lives contain so much sadness, worries, dissatisfaction and discontentment. oh wells. but in times like these, conformity seems to be a necessity. move on petrina. its time to move on.

these were the good old days where life was pretty much fun-filled with these three favourite friends. (: to the three of you if you read this, we've grown up in the same primary school and secondary school and now three of us in the same jc, hope this continues on. (: there were definitely good memories of each other in primary school, secondary and now also. (: im glad our paths crossed. (:

2007-04-02T20:25:00.000+08:00

im tired, sick with fever flu and everything else. i dont feel like thinking about anything now. goodbye world.

rahhhhh just go away.. ))):

2007-03-31T18:09:00.000+08:00

im falling ill. woke up with a fever this morning/afternoon. bleah ):. and i slept the whole day. i seriously need to study. but i feel really lousy today. i wanna go out. ): roarssss.

2007-03-31T00:14:00.000+08:00

seder meal today was nice! (: i felt the whole lenten vigil was really nice! (: haha but i was really tired commentating. my throat started getting dry by the third station. but its fun nonetheless! (: yay! (: the whole thing ended like 10 plus but it was worth it! ((: bleah, gotta do for shawn on tues also for emcee for parent teacher meeting. ))): rahhhh im sleepy sleepy sleepy!

maybe its not worth it after all.
no promises

2007-03-29T21:36:00.000+08:00

today was kinda good. (: although the day ended at four but it didn't seem that long afterall. nice nice day. (: i think im happier these days. and im keeping to my lent sacrifice. i hope it lasts till easter and beyond. alrights. seder meal tmw! (: hehe im kinda excited for it i dont know why. i havent been to one before but i think its going to be fun. (: anyway oh it was rover's birthday last weeek. hehe the boy that makes my day every day by waiting at the gate when i come home, comes into the room and jumps on me when im doing my work, and makes my grumpy days not so grumpy by just looking at me. haha he's so adorable (((: HAPPY 3RD BIRTHDAY ROVER BOY! (:

2007-03-27T22:08:00.000+08:00

celebrated gretchen's birthday today. ((: the four of us haven't gone out properly for so lonnggg and im glad we all met up today! (: hehe simple dinner plus catch up session was awesome (: its always nice to know that friends like them are always there. (: hope you like the present gretchen! ((: looking at the old photos that we took in secondary school was just hilarious! haha we were kinda silly in most photos especially one that we took in sec 3 at drama night that made us seem like we've never gone out before in our outside clothes. haha how deprived! aiighhts. gretchen goh! 12 years of friendship and counting! (((:
anyway mass pe plus a long long day which ended at four with only one break in the morning left me drained of energy at the end. i hate tues and thurs. they make me so grumpy and tired. haha. but on the bright side, tues is coming soon! (: real soon! (: hehe. aiights. back to complex numbers tutorial. im feeling rather happy now. haha dont know why.

2007-03-26T23:05:00.000+08:00

It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.

it can only be a wish
cause maybe i dont deserve it,
afterall maybe im not what you need.

2007-03-22T21:34:00.000+08:00

thursday
aights. the day turned out better especially later in the day cause sheryl and i went united sq starbucks to study! (: haha study session wasnt as effective but we had fun nonetheless! (((: haha happy day all thanks to ms sheryl wee! (: i love our conversations!((: it seems like we've countless things to talk about. maybe we should call mr foo to come with us one day!hehe

today
im here at home now at this time cause we rolled in mud today and it was so gross so i came home to bathe. gonna meet pam in awhile then go back to school. sian. haha mass pe is torturous. haha but it keeps me a little more fit! haha and boon i love the potatos! ((: alrights, movie night tonight.

anyway pics from my birthday which was really long ago. my 4 favourite friends ( aileen amelia gretchen ) , cartel ( shamir and sharmaine ) and william((: yup a surprise from all of them besides william cause he was with me all the time and he was planning with amelia where to go and all. haha he tricked me into going by the swimming pool area! haha anyway thanks a lot again to the 7 of you! even though its like a few months late. ((: love you all (((:

hehe this was when they were preparing to surprise. haha hiding in the playground area.
person no.1 : gretchen goh! (: MY 12 YEAR FRIEND! (((:

person no.2 : amelia lee qiu-yan, the person behind it all! ((:

person no.3 : sean lee kien fatt! (: haha thanks for the chocolates! (:

person no.4: aileen seah aining!((: person no.5:shamir lim person no.6: sharmaine(:

amelia lee with the big pillow! (:

and the person no.8 in the background of the picture: william tse! ((((: hehe thanks for everything (((: haha i really got tricked by you before that and was wondering why you wanted to take another route to my house and even wanted to sit by the swimming pool.

my four favourite friends! (:

amelia and sean! (: happy couple!

the love of my life (: william tse! (:

yours truly(:

love always,

thank you to each one of you. (:

okay thats all. it took me a really long time. anyway emo day today ): but tmw will be better! (: but it'll be a million times better if 12 days would come by tomorrow. ):

2007-03-21T21:04:00.000+08:00

school's becoming a dread now. haha maybe it has been since the start. haha oh wells . anyway a random talk with mr glascow and christy cause we met him in the canteen today made me press the panic button and i really should start studying harder from now on. haha. im gonna get my priorities right! (: from talking about literature, we digressed to gp and a levels and even talking about the j1s. anyway, life's pretty good now. lessons end earlier than last time. (: but mass pe's still a dread. and sheryl wee i have lots of fun making fun of you just like how much fun you have making fun of me! you better make peace with me!

people change over time. and somehow, somewhere, sometime we all gotta move on. somehow things arent the same anymore.its just different how the way we think, the way we go about doing things. perhaps this is the process of growing up and changing environments. along the way, we might not like doing the things we did last time, might hold different views on something, etc. i guess we can't avoid change. and i admit i've changed too. thought change might be painful, but i guess it might be for the better. sometimes, we've gotta let go of certain things. but i dont think regretting will ever be on my agenda, i hope it never will. but then again, maybe somehow,somewhere,sometime it might be.

2007-03-19T22:51:00.000+08:00

countdown: 16 more days

aights. orientation today again. dragon boating left me with an aching butt, an even more chao ta face. oh wells, no matter how much whitening cream i put, it wont matter anymore. haha. oh wells. anyway yes orientation today left me really tired that at the end of it i was really tired i couldnt move but, shar and i still had to do publicity stuf and i was almost dying at the end. plus there was welcoming ceremony practice after that. emceeing tmw hopefully will turn out fine. okay today ended just like that. a long day. ): but i had fun nonetheless with the always-energetic 1t11. haha sometimes i wonder how come they're always full of energy and they're only a year younger. haha oh wells. anyway i want the days to pass by faster cause every day that passes means the number on my msn nick and on my blog reduces! (:

sheryl wee: haha it was fun dragon boating with you today, even though we didnt manage to take the sampan and row off to emo on one island. hahah and no more blackmailing. thats if you stop making fun of me and my blog. and mr foo's our best friend (: haha. and today's bath was the most hilarious ever!

william: i love reading all the emails (: glad you're having fun there (: take care boy! ((:

2007-03-17T20:55:00.000+08:00

countdown: 18 more days.

hiaz. today's only the second day since he's gone. ): but today's events kept me busy so it wasnt as bad as yesterday. cousin's family moved house today. their house is really big and nice! ((: hehe im going to stay over more often (: helped them a little and then home. then it was out of the house again to go over to my eldest cousin's house for house blessing. i just love family gatherings (: they are the best family i can ever ask for. (: so thats how my day went. amidst all these, im still missing the boy a lot ): boy, go read your hotmail if you're reading this. hiaz. ):

爱我别走
如果你说
你不爱我不要听见
你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

2007-03-16T11:30:00.000+08:00

countdown: 19 more days

today's not a nice day. ): he's off early this morning ): the boy called me at about 5 plus am and he was already inside the gates. ): im going to miss him badly. ): talked and talked and then when he was boarding we put down. and then messaged till the plane took off. ): boy, im going to miss you. ): he's going to reach tokyo in about two hours. hiaz. waking up this morning and realising that i can't call or msg him feels so wrong and feels different. ): i dont know how the next two weeks is going to be like. ): i hope you'll read this when you get to tokyo airport. rahhhhh i wanna go too. ): argh. alrights, im going to try to make myself busy with work that i wont miss him so much. ): anyway boy, read your email okay. i sent it to gmail.and hope you're enjoying the book and the other thing. (: i'm loving you and missing you. you see if you didnt have to go, i wouldnt have cried. ):

baby, come home soon. ):

2007-03-13T10:47:00.000+08:00

i have funnier pics of him with funny hairstyles but i shall leave that for later (:
i dont want friday to come. )): im going to miss you boy. i had fun yesterday. (: doing all the spying all. haha and i love tu-tu! (:

2007-03-13T09:54:00.000+08:00

haha okay random pics up. orientation pics up next!

my prince ! ((: haha its impossible to get him to bathe.
MY BELOVED CARTEL (:
queen! ((: more talking sessions soon okay!
xiaoyan and weiqin! (: hahah my ever so cute badminton seniors! (:
haha my lovely class sleeping during math tutorial.

alrights, im off to pack my room

2007-03-10T16:01:00.000+08:00

im tired. i woke up at 1 something. haha was supposed to call william back last night but i fell asleep and he waited till 3am. anyway rockafella yesterday was good (: haha. im tired. alrights. life's doing me good just that i dont want friday to come. )))):

2007-03-07T21:37:00.000+08:00

hello! haven't been coming here for eons. anyway life's doing me good. ((: the last post was just random thoughts but i'm not depressed or anything. i was lazy to type in full sentences. anyway orientation's going alright but i miss my first three months IG )): but i got to do mass dance with lanz today! hahaha he pulled me like crazy during the running around part hooking arms. yup, anyway i shant say so much cause i'm tired. painting banners the past two days, running around like mad, learning house dance and all. TEJANO ((((: the best house ever! (: hope tmw's house night will turn out fine (: tmw's a long long day. anyway the past few weeks i havent blogged, i'm getting used to school and common tests are over finally! (: studying wasnt that fun but mr tse made it more fun by teaching me! (: anyway your noodle king today finally! (: hehe had fun cycling your bike today. (: alright, pictures of orientation soon!( :

for 6th march 2007 : HAPPY FOURTH MONTH BOY! ((: four months have been the nicest time ever (: the times we spent together, the times we just talk on the phone and start laughing at how retarded we can get, every night phone calls till late, our "sleepwalking", nonsensical words we come up with, coming over for math tuition, sneaking around!(: and everything else. (: thank you for tolerating everything no matter what especially when i seem to get angry with you.i love you. (:

alright, some pics from my por por's birthday (:

us and grandma! ((:

me and cherlyn! (: was feeding her cake (:
my sister with cherlyn (((: haha my sister looks old enough to be her mom. (:
my sister again with cherlyn and her bro (:

2007-03-02T17:25:00.000+08:00

its over its over. i've gotten over it. maybe. perhaps. a motivation. a will. determination probably. mixed. confused. annoyed. puzzled. :( . amazed. speechless.

thats all for today.

2007-02-26T21:19:00.000+08:00

the week ahead seems bleak and i want it so much to pass by quickly. but anyhow, i've been happy! ((: hehe all thanks to mr william tse. i can't imagine how im going to pass math without you! hehe tuition sessiosn are fun haha but it always leaves us half dead esp after like three hours or more. alrights, back to more math! ((: haha and your primary school video is so so so so cute!((:

sang rang hae yo boy(:

2007-02-24T14:28:00.000+08:00

the love of my life (((:

2007-02-23T22:39:00.000+08:00

alright, im too lazy to upload so many so here's just a few. (:

2007-02-22T21:23:00.000+08:00

life's doing me good. ((: school's good all thanks to my classmates (: pam and christy and all (: and william tse too (: yesterday was nice and funny. haha you made me laugh esp when you were giving my mom the oranges.hehe anyway cts next week, aint prepared but i'll just hope for the best. its making me press the panic button alraedy so i guess i'm getting into the studying momentum! (: tmw's a short day! ((: happy girl for today! (:

please don't go baby.

2007-02-21T18:17:00.000+08:00

cny was alright, didn't really feel much this year. it came and went and now it's back to studying for cts. i have a motivational factor and that's keeping me going. though it isnt a good one but at least there is. anyway i think i'm falling ill. just hope it'll go away.

it's hard to comprehend why certain things happen. only when it's over do we actually realise that that something has made us a stronger person. but i guess the process is difficult and sometimes even hurtful. it's through suffering and pain that we learn to treasure what we have and be contented. sometimes, fighting for something and getting it in the end isn't that great afterall. even though you've got it, but sometimes you realise you don't deserve it and regret in the end. maybe being easily satisfied solves it all, maybe being by yourself is good, maybe being indifferent towards everything makes you a happier person. maybe, we'll never know.

thank you william tse for coming over today to teach me! ((: hehe sorry if i made you mad!

2007-02-18T01:29:00.000+08:00

reunion dinner was good (: and then it was off to church for 10.30pm mass till midnight. nice mass topped up with chinese new yr songs and lion dance. anyway emo days are over, i think getting sad over stuff aint worth it anymore and it just takes up brain space and creates emotional upheaval so no more saddd days! (: i'm just gonna ignore whatever that's making me sad.i'm gonna tell myself its not worth it, you're not worth it, that's not worth it to anything thats making myself sad. cause i know i've changed. two years ago, i would get rid of whatever affecting me and whatever's hindering my path, two years ago, my priorities were right. two years ago, i was more focused. two years ago, i loved who i was. two years ago, i was a more determined person.two years ago, i had alot of goals for myself. and two years ago, i respected who i really was.two years ago, i achieved what i wanted. and now i'm going back to who i really am. anyway i'm looking forward to meeting the tans tmw! ((:

2007-02-17T12:15:00.000+08:00

i'm not really looking forward to cny. but oh wells. anyway, yesterday was fun! (: concert was not bad, the odacers' item was so cute! hahaha i love my class odacers! ((: anyway, yes school ended at 12 something and then went town to meet william! (: hehe went to eat at wisma and then back to buy milk tea and then we walked, shopped and waited till three! (: hehe cause we wanted to eat sushi buffet! haha and turned out to be it starts at 12. haha bet he was going to kill me already cause we waited so long. the queue before that was super long and plus it didnt help that the entire world was in town. haha but it was good to see all the people whom i havent seen in a long long time! it was good seeing marianne wong and cherlyn! ((((: anyway, then we ate our sushi, and we were really dying at the end of it. hahah that boy say can eat a lot but actually he can't la! haha and we resorted to playing games in the end to finish off the last bit. haha then we walked around to find shoes and then home to get changed for bernie's party. haha oh and we saw claudio on the bus! (: anyway went home to get changed for bernie's party and then met the rest of the cousins there. HAPPY 18 BIRTHDAY BERNIE! ((:

how did i fall in love with you
what can i do to make you mine?

i'm scared
cause the past will keep coming back
i'm afraid
cause feelings may fade
i'm worried
that you'll stop loving me.

2007-02-15T22:29:00.000+08:00

school ended at one today cause mdm ban decided to give us two periods off! ((: haha she rocks la, anyway met william at tp to eat and buy his stuff and then to town before heading back to school for council stuff. hehe its been really good seeing him almost every day of this week (:

please don't go
i'm going to miss you so
cause i don't know
how nights will be without you
how i'm going to sleep without
hearing you say "love you"
at the end.
please don't go
two weeks is a long time
and i never wanna say goodbye
cause i'm loving you..

2007-02-14T18:24:00.000+08:00

hello world. i haven't been here in a long long time. the week's been really hectic and i don't even have time to come online nowadays. anyway valentine's day was spent going back to ij for invest. i really miss ij and all of them a lot. a whole load that i wish i could retain forever in ij. this is my second year sitting back and watching my successors do their job and i must say it's quite heartening to see them do what they need to do and do what i've done last time. singing the school song once again made me feel totally at home and gives me a nostalgic feeling, hearing the head prefect give her speech made me think back and think that two years ago i was standing up there giving my speech and being kinda nervous about it, seeing the head prefect pass on the flame to the rest of the board made me think that i too once passed on that flame to the rest of my board, hearing them sing the ij spirit song made me feel that i'll always be at home here in ij. i guess leading the prefectorial board and just being part of it made me learnt a lot. mingling with the prefects after the event was just awesome, catching up, laughing at old times, seeing them all move from sec 2 last time and now to sec 4, and they were just mere junior prefects when i was sec four. i miss them so much. i guess we've to move forward in life and the only thing we can do is cherish and keep the past memories close to our hearts. ij has given me a lot, taught me a lot, nurtured me into a better person. those ten years in ij will be the best part of my life, my growing journey. (:

the ij spirit's living on,
it's stretching far and far beyond
it's never gonna die
it's gonna live in each of us
and we will keep it buring burning strong
the flame of zest lies in us all along
always inspiring us
to go on....

anyway thank you william tse for yesterday and for being the first to wish me happy valentine's day. (:

2007-02-08T23:59:00.000+08:00

okay i havent been here in a long long time. birthday entry soon when my favourite friends send me pictures of that day. (: but birthday was realyl really nice all thanks to especially my favourite friends+cartel+williamtse ((((: my favourite people in this world besides family (((: anyhow, this is my favourite friend for now. and these week has been a crazy busy week with me spending only a few hours sleeping. i'm really really tired but i'm happy cause my favourite boy cycled to my house to give me the chocolate thing he made! ((: and class outing on sun was good good plus shar's birthday yesterday which almost drove me nuts running around and then finally going for the wake last night and the funeral this afternoon.
my most loved and respected teacher, please stay strong.we all love you.

anyway, this is my favourite friend now! ((: haha i miss times with you! and the bus rides home.thanks for the collage and the birthday surprise! ((:

2007-02-01T22:50:00.000+08:00

okay today's pretty much a boring day. anyway after school had meeting with the interns for cny then stayed back. and daddy forgot to pick me up so i waited till like 6 plus and then when he finally picked me up, my guitar teacher msged me to say he's coming in ten mins. i totally forgot about it. rah and i didnt practise at all and i forgot the stuff he taught me last week. felt quite bad cause he had to go through it all over again.

anyway, here's to my 12 year friend HAPPY BIRTHDAY NICOLE YONG! (((: my since primary one best friend all the way till now!and our birthday's are only one day different! ((: hey girl, i still remember us being childish little kids in primary one being in the same class and playing all sorts of funny games with gretchen too! haha still remember the three of us were called da bao, xiao bao and medium bao! haha. im glad our friendship came such a long way! ((: i still remember all your birthday parties every year and how i've come to know almost every one in your family even your auntie, grandmother and so on. and i love your mom! (((: hehe always seeing her at our prefects' investitures and always talking to her then. anyway thanks for being such a great friend the past 12 years! (((: more to come okay! anyway here's wishing you a happy 18th birthday once again! ((: Stay pretty always! hahaha and we'll still play the poking face game even when we're 80 years old! haha alright take care! ((:

haha these unglam pictures..
primary 2 or 3

primary 4

and finally to JC1

2007-01-30T19:58:00.000+08:00

work is piling up like crazy .rahh lit essay due tmw and another one due on fri. cny proposal due tomorrow, everything's coming too fast. rah if only time would come to a stop or if we had more than 24 hours a day. somehow i have so many things to be done every day but not everything gets done. roars. anyway im getting happier by the day. i've learnt to accept things better i guess. i hope this feeling stays. it sucks to be sad every day.. im loving my class more each day, appreciating each and every one of them more.im glad im in t33 ((: i wasted the last yr not getting to know them bettter. but im gonna make the next 3/4 year much better (: alright, im off to do my work! (: yay the end of the week is coming soon soon! ((: im a happy girl today! (((: hehe thank you classmates for always making my day! ((:

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

2007-01-28T16:15:00.000+08:00

rahhhhhh im stressing over so many stuff. so many things to do. i hope this week's gonna be a nice week! roarss im pressing panic button for so many things. this is not good at all. anyway friday was nice having dinner with william, running in the rain all. (((: sat was really fun with pam and the class! but i really really miss cheryl ang now. at the airport was sad. why must you leave cheryl ang!!! rah!!!!! anyway at the airport was with pam,christy,huixin,joel,boon and qikai. rahh cheryl ang come back!! )): and today's like boring day. somehow i think the week's going to be like crap. rahhh this is depressing plus the boy is going to work. ):

anyway thank you pam for everything. i really appreciate all the time spent together. i dont know what life would be without you. you make everything seem much better and you make me feel better everytime im sad. you're like the friend i can talk to so easily and there's no awkwardness whatsoever. thank you for understanding me, for never failing to provide a listening ear and for being just there whenever i needed someone. thank you for being such a great partner in class. (:

2007-01-26T23:26:00.000+08:00

okay im not supposed to blog but here's a post to my two favourite people (: today's still an emo day though.

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH why always must like that!

2007-01-23T20:53:00.000+08:00

hello! ((: today's been a really long day. ended at 4pm with chem prac and pe today. we were all dying towards the end of the day. 4pm days are just torturous )): plus there's lit class. haha anyway but after school was fun! (: met shamir and then we went town. walked around to find his school bag. hahaha his now bag is hilarious. its too small for him. anyway yeah then we met bel and CHERYL ANG!!!! omg its damn fun and nice talking to her. i miss her so much in class, all her noisiness!! haha and its so nice hearing her stories! ahha we got damn excited at gelare and screamed and everyone turned and looked at us. yeah then she left while we were looking for andrew's present. so it was left with bel shamir and me. walked around everywhere and then home! (: today's a happy day cause i met cheryl ang! (: anddd im meeting AILEEN SEAH AINING ON SAT for dinner! (((:

AILEEN SEAH! i miss you so much you know! i miss going to school in sec 4 with you sleeping on the table and being so irritated whenever someone wakes you up. i miss walking up the hill with you in the morning and i miss having breaks with you.i miss you saying "if you say so" and irritating the shit out of the three of us!i miss the four of us hanging out together after school, during school, anytime and everytime. cant imagine one year passed like that. and i miss going to acjc during first three months in your mom's car. i miss everything about you! i cant wait to see you on saturday! ((((:

anyway i doubt i'll be blogging soon. the past few entries hasnt been too happy. i guess its time to go on a break. maybe my birthday will bring happier memories. alright.im tired of blogging.

If you loved me as much as you said you did
Then you wouldn’t have hurt me like I ain’t shit
Now you pushed me away like you never even knew me
I loved you with my heart, really and truly

2007-01-19T19:38:00.000+08:00

rah. okay anyway we played badminton during pe today! ((((: i love badminton! (: anyway chem CA was just crap, i filled in option C for almost half the paper cause i didnt have time and i didnt know how to do. im so screwed really. and studying in the library with christy while the rest of the class had their H1, was hilarious. we laughed till we cried and couldnt stop laughing. hahah FISHY! we were being mean but oh wells. haha the conversation was really damn funny and it all revolved around one. haha anyway had council and then im home. didnt go for IG outing and didnt go out with council people cause im just not in the mood. ): rahhhhhhh. on a brighter side, im meeting amanda on sun again! (: meeting her the other day and talking till late at coffee bean at holland v was just really nice. i realised how much i miss her and even though we havent seen each other for a few months but it felt like she's been there all these while. my ac best friend! (:

one last chance
i dont know how many i've given you already
you disappointed me countless times
i'll give you one last one
i hope you'll treasure it.
words cant do much, only actions can
its all up to you now.

2007-01-18T16:56:00.000+08:00

today's a really tiring day. emotionally and maybe physically too. ): went to school not feeling like going to school and feeling like crap. rah. had math FA and essay test today which i totally wasnt in the mood to do. but im really glad there was boon huixin gomez and christy with me. and pam was so nice to msg me even though she's sick and is at home ((: get well soon girl! i miss you even for one day! ): yeah break was really nice with the four of them .haha we were laughing at everything and anything. and i ought to get kicked out of 2t33 already .ahaha today i commited my second offence which i shall not tell the guys in my class cause they'll really kick me out. haha. anyway rah that was the only happy time of the day and the only time i smiled. thanks to the four of you who made me happy. more such nice breaks together! (: thanks boon and huixin esp. and and thank you amelia lee for sneaking out of class to the toilet to be with me while i cried. it means so much. alright. till then.

i really dont know what now
you're confusing me
cause i dont know what you really want
all i want is to be happy.

2007-01-17T21:07:00.000+08:00

rah. today's a screwed up day. really .
i just wanted to go away and just be by myself.
it made me all sad.
maybe angry to an extent.
rah. must this always happen after all i put in?
have you ever considered how i feel?
i guess not.
but it breaks my heart to know that.
holding back my tears aint an easy job.
why why why must this ever happen.
rah. i hate the way things are right now
i really know why people say
find someone who loves you more than you do.
maybe it isnt that painful in that case.
i really wanna think in a positive way
but you have to do something about it.
rah. maybe i shouldn place too much hope anyway
cause maybe i'll be disappointed again..

2007-01-11T21:30:00.000+08:00

and sooooo.... orientation's over! )))): i miss orientation. miss going to school at a crazy hour of 6.45, preparing for the day's activites, seeing my ig IG3! ((: , seeing my class 1t09! (: carrying the placard all around the place, playing dirty games, going to PA being game master, being i/c of dragon boating- sitting with sheryl wee on the coast talking for almost two hours was just nice and emo and we didnt realise mr foo was there haha sher we're such emo kids! cheering for forar house!!! rahhhhh i dont like school and lessons!! )): i miss orientation!! and meeting so many new people even the facils like the non council people like lynette, jon lauw my partner! and the rest of them! and knowing the j3s too like thadd, marianne, jon ong, elena, hafiz and all. jon ong's teasing about porn every morning and every time he sees me! hahah im glad i went through orientation even though i was complaining about it. oh and getting to talk to my class people who are facils - lala, gareth, ronald, janice! ((:

finale night was crazy! ((: haha it was really fun fun! forar house really should have won!! ((: haha every house agrees with that!! but the skits were damn funny, the storm was kinda funny, and the cheers were just madness! ((: haha. FORAR!!!!!! (((: did mass dance with sher wee and it was damn funny! haha FORAR WE'RE UNBELIEVABLE! ((((((((: supper at newton circus with sharmaine, amelia, sean and then mr and mrs leong came over too!

lessons today was just dead. first lecture of the day was chem and the the facils took up the last row and everyone was sleeping or playing a fool cause no one had lecture notes and we were catching snowballs. haha. but it was good to see 2t33 again! ((((: miss them so much! ((((: seeing pam and sitting next to her in class is just awesome! ((: haha i miss you pamela yeo yu hui!! ((: we're going to the library more often okay!

i miss orientation! )): i miss my IG!!! rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

and william's away watching the dance floor at mediacorp now!

2007-01-09T22:16:00.000+08:00

last day of orientation tmw. haha these few days' been really really tiring esp today, running all over kallang to pick the classes up and bringing them to and fro from the dragon boat association. haha but its fun anyhow! (: im really tired. haha but orientation's really really fun! ((: dinner with my ig at seoul garden last night was really really fun. hahah i love my ig! it seems like we've known each other for such a long time when its been only three days! (((: haha playing chubby buddy with lanz jasmine and nicholas and a few others. haha shall post pictures of our unglam shots. rah i dont want orientation to end!! i dont wanna go back to school ! )): FINALE NIGHT TMW! ((: GO FORAR!

anyway THANK YOU WILLIAM TSE! ((: thank you for surprising me by helping me change the template and for making it look nicer than my previous one (: love you. (:

2007-01-06T17:52:00.000+08:00

banner painting today with forar! (: left with amelia to go buy gold paint and then to buy lunch back for the rest of them. haha newton! (: anyway yeah since we couldnt stay in school after one so we all went to tash's house! ((: haha had quite a bit of fun painting there. and we're almost done with our big big banner! ((: yay! im really exhausted. i think im going to go crazy soon. really.

Jamie: I'm so sorry, i really should've told you sooner.
Landon: Nah I made you do too many things, i kept you out ... I...
Jamie: No no no, if anything you kept me healthy longer.
Landon: Are you scared?
Jamie: To death.. ?.. (Jamie smiles) Lighten up!
Landon: It's not funny.
Jamie: ... I'm scared of not being with you.
Landon: (Hugs) Oh baby that will never happen.

its from a walk to remember when jamie told landon about her illness and that her illness was incurable.

im scared of not being with you.
i dread the day you'll say you wanna leave me.
cause i never wanna leave you despite all thats happened
all those happy memories are etched deeply in my heart
and i'll never forget that
even if one day i might forget
i'll still look into the book and remember all that we've been through together
thank you for coming into my life
you're the best thing that ever happened to me.
6th nov's the best day of my life.
happy 2nd month boy

2007-01-06T00:30:00.000+08:00

today was fun fun (: although standing in the hot sun for many many hours didnt really help much and i got burnt again )): plus screaming at the top of my voice to get the grps all ready aint that fun. haha. anyway today's our last day with our ig! )): kinda got used to my ig and getting familiar with them and now they're gonna be separated into their classes. oh well. i got 1t09! ((: ah im tired. went for campfire at ij just now. the sec ones are so cute! ((((: okay im tired and grumpy now. till then. 3 more days of orientation. (:

2007-01-04T22:52:00.000+08:00

Hello! just here to certify my existence. havent updated in a few days, been really busy with the whole orientation thingy, so i'll be back with updates next week or something.

2006-12-31T14:04:00.000+08:00

But for now, let me say
(Without hope or agenda)
Just because it's Christmas
(And at Christmas you tell the truth)
To me, you are perfect
And my wasted heart will love you

2006-12-31T00:44:00.000+08:00

past few days were spent at facil camp. haha it was really fun and tried out all the games and all. learning mass dance isnt an easy feat at all. haha sorry jon lauw!thanks for being such a nice partner! ((: its been really tiring as well, days were so long and yup getting sun burnt at PA. but yesterday was good cause i met william after camp. (: haha our Al-Ameen plan never works out and we end up doing other silly stuff. haha tmw's new yr's eve and its gonna be really nice cause in the day is cousin's camp! ((: followed by my cousin's birthday party and then its off to meet the aileen clarissa gretchen and amelia to celebrate new year! ((: esplanade dinner and stayover! ((: and i hope i get to meet the boy. yay im so excited for tmw! ((((: i hope its gonna be good. but i dont want 2006 to come to an end. im not ready for 2007. i havent tied up loose ends. i havent done much this year. it hasnt been good. but i guess its all too late...

2006-12-26T23:12:00.000+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!! ((:
this christmas's one of the best ever. (: christmas eve was spent going to church in the morning and then shopping for last min presents. oh the night before mummy and i went shopping and the entire town was filled with people taking photos of the pretty pretty lights along orchard road and there were carolling all along too! could really feel the christmas spirit! (: yeah then went for family party at my cousin's house. its an every year thing but every year seems nicer and the family's really expanding with new members each yr! this year was pretty crowded and the gift exchange part is so fun! ((: secret santa! haha jason got me again this year and he gave me a top! (: and i got marcus, my sis's bf. and we all got many many presents from the adults! (((: anyway after dinner, it was back home to get changed for christmas midnight mass! met the entire family back in church again! (: midnight mass is always so nice and beautiful. it always reminds us of what christmas is all about, also the four weeks of advent before christmas never fails to make us think and realise that there's always more to christmas then presents and everything else.its this year that i start thinking and waking up that i've moved away from God alot. He seems so distant in my life nowadays and He's no longer the first person i turn to whenever i face trouble or problems. i never made the effort to patch back the distance. i guess its time to do so. i know He's the person that knows me inside out and only He knows whats going to happen to me and the only one that can help me. i guess im going to do something about it. i hope. anyway christmas day was nice (((: jason's party. im sorry jason, shar, bel and shamir! i'll make it up to you all! ((:
met william at 7 plus and then we were supposed to go eat prata. haha but 48 came so we decided to go to holland v instead! ((: oh before that while we were walking to the busstop from newton mrt, this boy gave me a nice nice surprise! ((: thank you a million! ((: i really didnt expect it at all (: we ate, then went to walk around holland v, sat down at some place. haha and this boy was trying to help me crack my back but he couldnt! haha. then we were deciding what to do next and haha funny stuff came up like going to night safari and other funny places and then we decided to go botanic gardens! by the time we got there it was like already almost eleven i think. haha we had to walk super far to get there! i even walked bare footed for a distance. haha and i was grabbing his bag super tightly cause the trees were creeping me out! haha but it was really nice and fun! ((: and so we reached botanic gardens! had a nice walk and there were people still jogging and taking a walk. the place is really beautiful at night (((: yup stayed there till late late and there was no one left already. haha and went to eat supper at newton! ((: yups then home.

i had the best christmas. i love christmas. it never fails to make me feel happy and feel loved. thanks a lot to the tan family for making my christmas a beautiful one every year. ((: the trip with the 2 cousins really made me thank God for such beautiful family (: yups. thank you william for such a nice christmas too (: thank you for the present, the time spent together and everything else (:

2006-12-23T16:46:00.000+08:00

hello. im back! ((: after four days. haha the past four days have been really great and fun! ((: esp with my two cousins and bro and aunt and uncle too. hahah this is cousins camp with only the four of us! anyway im really tired now. after the long long long ride , haha and with all the crankiness of my cousins.haha conversations never fail to evoke laughter. alright. im too lazy to type.maybe i'll upload pics later. hahah i only have a few pics but i have those of our cake party on the last night! haha. alright.

anyway i just saw something that made me angry.for once im really angry and not irritated.but im not going to ask you about it.roarss.this is not a good christmas gift.

2006-12-20T13:33:00.000+08:00

what i want is a christmas surprise...

2006-12-20T12:12:00.000+08:00

rah decided this morning that i'll go for retreat instead so i packed all my stuff and went to school. then mom said i have to go msia so that means to leave at 3. mr leong said might as well not come for camp at all cause they're off to east coast park later after lunch . rahhh i wanna go for retreat now. but anyway on a brighter note, more time spent with family.more shopping. ((: okay im off to pack my bag again. see you all in a few days time
anyway yesterday met marianne at tanjong pagar to get william's camera back and then watched the holiday with william and then haha we sat down for like two hours watching stuff on his video. damn funny. (((((:

2006-12-18T01:38:00.000+08:00

okay felt the sudden thing to not go sleep and to write somemore stuff.was reading shan's blog and she was talking about something about family and all, about how we often think that the being in someone else's shoes would be better, much more enjoyable and tolerable. i guess i often think that way too. like somehow this person's life seems to be all so perfect. but i guess ultimately i wouldn wanna ever swop places with anyone. life's good cause of the family i have. they've been the people who stand all my nonsense and without uncertainty, i know they're the people i can really fall back on. this strucked me cause a few days ago, i screamed at my sis for some small minor stuff and then she msged me when i left and i felt so guilty cause she said sorry when it wasnt even her fault and said " i hope we'll have a decent conversation next time okay (: ". i guess she wanted to make my day better cause i was all grumpy. that msg made me thank god for such a wonderful sis and to appreciate her even more. now, i guess when i wanna scream at her or anyone else in the family, i think twice cause i know im the one being spoilt and unreasonable.i enjoyed the times before she left for canada cause i could talk to her anytime and i missed her a whole lot when she wasnt here that i cried sometimes esp during the o level period and now that she's back, i dont treasure her and i ignore her sometimes.and this entry's only about my sis, haha imagine how long this if i wrote about the rest of my family.
anyway i really thank god for such a wonderful and perfect family . ((:

and she wrote this " he understands everything and when i talk,he listens no matter how boring i am. in short, he loves me. his love isn't the "i'll-call-you-everyday",kind of love. it's the kind of love that lets me know that no matter what happens to me, no matter how ugly or stupid i may end up to be, he'll be by my side, and he'll always think i'm beautiful".. i thought this was really nice ((:

2006-12-18T01:05:00.000+08:00

today's a really stayhome day. went for mass in the morning. haha i always get screamed at every sun morning to wake up cause i always make the whole family late for mass, oh and my bro too. haha whole house always filed with noise to wake the both of us up. anyway then after mass, it was lunch with the tans and sister ( nun) who came from malaysia then to uncle's house. good time talking to che feli,shawn and bro. anyway yeah then home. weather was too good so i slept all the way till 5 something cause had guitar lesson at 6. today was fun ((: haha i learnt a lot more stuff. gonna learn songs next week! ((: yup justin, my guitar teacher is really nice. haha he's damn patient with me. then dinner with my family near heartland mall there. came home and then around ten plus, went to meet william for supper at newton. haha nice supper ((: sis is flying off tmw morning to hongkong. )))): rah one week without her. im gonna miss her presence! alrights time to sleep.

2006-12-16T17:11:00.000+08:00

the whole week's been a rather fun week ((:
didnt meet amanda in the end. was supposed to go with her for lunch and then to bugis but in the end, i couldn go. ): and she's only free after the hols cause she's got ogl camp and then she's off to india. ): anyway so went out with my family to go home system shopping again. sitting in the showrooms hearing different sounds and watching different movies all aint that fun and i just sit there stoning. haha the other time they were playing eric clapton's concert, and it was nice (: all the systems look and sound the same to me. only my bro knows whats in all those gadgets. yes and im so tired now. haha when we came home just now, met auntie valerie downstairs walking ollie. haha she's so pretty and cute. conversations with her plus mummy are always about rover and ollie. haha but its kinda interesting. rover likes ollie alot. ((: he always waits at the lift to see if she's coming down.

anyway weds and thurs were spent shopping. met up with dearest aileen seah on wed where we last min in the evening decided to go shopping for christmas stuff! in the end it was aileen, janella and me! haha met janelle when we were shopping and she joined us. haha first time talking to her. dinnered together too and heard all about the ac stuff and all thats happening! all the council stuff too. janelle's nice and cute! haha the three of us spent a long time in the mango sale digging all the stuff and we managed to find stuff! ((: hahah the three of us were being damn auntie all and just kept finding stuff. haha both of them are damn cute!

thurs: met up with zelina cause she just came back from australia. then it was celine, zelina, jessie, gekshan, adeline and me! (: royal chocolate house outing too! (: had a good time catching up on each other's lives and all. kinda made me miss ij a lot. ): then met pam and we shopped till night! ((:

hols are ending and im not ready for school at all ))): rahhhh i still wanna play!

2006-12-14T01:41:00.000+08:00

and this post is to my beloved friend goh song yao. haha. welcome back to singapore from switzerland! ((: and talking to you online made me realise how long i havent spoken to you. last time it used to be continuous msges esp during lessons and studying together after school, after trainings and even on saturdays. ah i miss those days where we just sat down and instead of studying, end up talking and being emo together. i never imagined i would say i miss talking to you but just now proved me wrong! you're realy a friend i never wanna lose (: thanks for the past one yr of friendship! though the girls are not part of badminton anymore, but hope we'll all still remain close! (:

you nearly cried, i nearly did too.

2006-12-13T18:41:00.000+08:00

shopping with mummy today in town and in bugis! ((:

you seem so grumpy everytime i talk to you,
i dont know how to make you smile anymore
maybe its just me.
but i know i still love you...

2006-12-13T01:07:00.000+08:00

roars second post of the day. and so the rest of the evening was spent at the doctor cause i cant breathe properly at night and i've been coughing like nobody's business for the past week or more. roars. today's a grumpy dayyyyyyyyyy )))))))):

iwonderwhyithinksomuchimsosorrydear.

2006-12-12T15:57:00.000+08:00

oh man, today's like doing-stuff-for-the-house day. first mummy woke me up to go eat breakfast haha and then i went back to sleep and she woke me up again at 1 something to help her fix the light. hahah apparently when she was changing the bulb, then the whole glass thing was going to drop so we both had to take turns to hold the glass plus the bulb for 45 mins. haha imagine standing on a high chair reaching out for the bulb and glass. haha hilarious. anyway then marcus and my sis came home to take rover out to the vet for vaccinations at mount pleasant clinic. haha so i had to go as well. went to the vet and joyce was there helping out (: haha so fun to work there! they first weighed rover and he's like super overweight! he's like 7.75kg when he's supposed to be 5 only. they cant even feel his ribs when they put their hands over. haha anyway injected in something and did a blood test. and then we were done ((: haha he's a healthy boy! ((: and now im bored at home while someone's out playing soccer! )): haha

2006-12-11T23:00:00.000+08:00

today's a really panicky day. haha was really scared how things were gonna turn out and i even didnt wanna do the thing afterall but im glad i made it. (: thanks pam for helping me out! (((: thanks for spending the whole day with me, waking up so early even though we slept at 3 something am last night, for walking and hearing me whine and whine and whine and being ever so grumpy today. (: love you girl!
anyway hope you liked the thing i made for you (:

2006-12-11T03:04:00.000+08:00

its 3.04 am now and im still awake. roars. i hope tmw turns out good. i dont know how you think actually. alright im off to do some stuff. i really hope everything goes well.

2006-12-10T13:25:00.000+08:00

roarsss today's a boring day cause everyone's out besides mummy and daddy. and i wanna bring rover to bishan park but its so hot and im so lazy..haha i was supposed to have tuition today but im too lazy again to msg my tuition teacher plus i have guitar lesson at 6 later.thats quite fun though but roarss. my hols are starting to be useless and not fun anymore. )): but yay pam's gonna come over tmw to! ((: and im gonna meet amanda lim on thurs for dinner! ((((:

Hey baby, when we are together, doing things that we love.
Everytime you're near I feel like I’m in heaven, feeling high
I don’t want to let go, girl.
I just need you you to know girl.

2006-12-09T17:17:00.000+08:00

its this time of the year that there seems to be a rush to get things done, to think back on year that has just gone by so quickly, to think how life had been, to catch up on the distanced friendships over the year, to catch up on the work thats yet to be done, to catch up on the lost time. over the years, this becomes a routine. each year, i think of doing something different but it turns out that its the same all over again. i dont think i've changed for the better. thats sad. i've grown over the year, my thinking has changed. i cant imagine that a year ago, i was still thinking of being posted to a different school from the rest of my friends, and now its one year more become i leave this school. reading the senior's blogs, they are all starting to say how they'll miss this school and how their life in cj had been a fulfilling one, but yet i think to myself, will i think like them in a year's time? its sad to know that deep down i have my answer. perhaps i just made a wrong choice in the first place. but i guess i know that coming to this school has let me know one person that changed my life (: i feel like gazing at stars...till then..

2006-12-08T23:09:00.000+08:00

william came over this morning, met him at 11 and then off we went to bishan hoping that there were courts to play. hahaha the stupid cc there didnt have and even better they didn even have nets! haah anyway so we went to eat, laughed and made accronyms with lots of things and he was driving me crazy. anyway, walked around j8 and then decided to go try tanglin cc. haha we're such badminton addicts. haha we'vebeen trying so many places and we're always so unlucky cause its either they have some function or some chess competition. anyway they didnt have courts there. and then he had to go home cause he had to go do his passport..

wanna tell you im not always angry with you
i still love you alright?

2006-12-07T00:04:00.000+08:00

today's a good good day. (((: met william at holland v at ten something in the morning to eat bk breakfast. haha we both were late and ended up wondering if there was still breakfast. hehe anyway ate our breakfast. ((: then headed to town to watch movie. watch flags of our fathers at ps. it was rather good. but it wasnt that sad actually. not waht i thought it would be. :/ then we went to eat play the spot the difference game! hahahah we spent like manymanymany dollars on that stupid game just cause we wanted to beat the record and we were damn irritated when we couldn get it. hahah then we ate pepper lunch! (((: and then walked and walked and walked till we ended up at centrepoint. stopped at starbucks cause our legs were aching from all the walking. sat there, talked and talked, laughed about other people haha and then went back to my house. ((((((: and spent a whole lot of time there.so today was ten am to ten pm
HAPPY ONE MONTH DEAR (:
thanks for everything, starting from day one from setting the tealights thing to today. i know there are so many stuff that happened. well i hope things will be better in the future. thanks for the many many memories. going out everyday,studying together, going to watch countless movies, taking a long long bus ride to some unknown place, sitting at the playground talking, long long phone calls, sneaking around weird places, walking through the "dark" path, being indecisive of what to do.you certainly made a difference in my life.thank you for coming into my life. (: loveyouboy. (:

2006-12-02T02:04:00.000+08:00

and so yesterday was the j2's prom and council had to be there. haha it was kinda fun to see what everyone wore and everything. i had fun nonetheless taking photos and all, it kinda like seemed it was our prom. anyway thanks sheryl for making last night even nicer esp talking to you about everything and all. never got the chance to talk to you this much even though we've been in the same school for many many years. it was good talking to you (: .alright i'll let the pics describe how prom went..

shar and i during preparations

sheryl joanne

annabel (:

bel and sheryl

CARTEL (: shamir shar me bel (:

shamir lim (:

haha they look like twins (:

xiaoyan in the middle (:

sheryl ((:

QUEEN! ((((:

the best captain (:

ian kwek ((:

pretty shar (:

mr vice president (:

mr ex vice president (:

tash (:

marianne (:

pretty amelia lee qiu-yan ((:

me and shar! (:

amelia again!

sheryl again!((:

thats all folks. (:

2006-11-29T22:10:00.000+08:00

yesterday was super exciting!! (((((((: its the best day out of my hols so far (((((: haha okay besides council in the afternooon where there was only gerard and me in our comm for grad night. haha and coffee bean with the cartel plus pam. PAM AND I WENT TO THE AIRPORT! ((((: so we took a bus from town to airport. journey there was long long long but it was nice nonetheless cause i had pam to talk to! (((: and we had seats so we didnt need to stand (((: haha im still so excited about yesterday! yup took quite some time and then we reached terminal one! ((: it was still early so we decided to walk around. oh on the bus, called james to ask him what time will they be there and all and told him not to tell celine that we're going. anyway yes so we walked and walked around the departure area and when we were so excited about giving her the surprise, SHE CAME TO SURPRISE US INSTEAD!! ROARS YOU KNOW! haha we wanted her to be damn shocked but in the end , we were the shocked ones. haha so talked to her family all and then, guess who we met! hahah james chen! haha none of us recognised him at first cause he looked different with his new specs. haha. and soo we decided to be mean and started testing his colour sense! haha he's damn cute. yup walked around, waited for them to check in their lugguages. and cherlyn's coming back that night too at around that time so we thought of going to see her too! ((: anyway so, celine and all the choir people went in.. felt so excited for them! ((: so then pam and i were still deciding whether we should take the last bus home or just spend the night over at the airport. haha so we decided to go find cher first but after waiting so long with corrine and her family, she still didnt come out so we decided to go off!

and then...it was already 12 something plus plus. we took a bus to town! (: haha we thought we took the wrong bus. two blur people together can get no where! bus ride back was good cause there werent anyone and it was emo-ing session again between the two of us. reached town and we decided to meet william at his house since we were actually planning to walk home from there and we would pass by his house. so we met him at his house outside and we three walked to newton circus to eat. ((: we three shared hokkien mee and then talked and talked and then we walked back to his house. and pam and i cabbed home (((: hahah reached home and was so sneaky all cause didnt wanna wake anyone up but cute rover had to come out and disturb us. hahah so we did the book thing until 4plus and we slept on the couch. ((: hahah okay thats all for the day.

THANK YOU PAMELA YEO YU HUI! ((: thanks for your company, for never failing to comfort me and for always being there. thanks for all the gossip sessions, emo-ing talks, countless "hows" during our conversations, and for just being so understanding. i dont want this hols to end cause we havent had enough fun yet! im sure things will get better for you, really. and thanks for staying up with me to do that thing last night! i love you babe!!! im gonna do the thing for you also, but yours will be much more special cause i have few years to do for you! it will prob be like a few books! manymany more outings yea? ((((: love you!

Thank you william tse for coming out even though you're sick. it was good seeing you even though it was such a short time. ((: hehe dont be so sneaky eh! loves. ((:

2006-11-28T12:05:00.000+08:00

alright this is quite long ago, before cher left for nepal. and she's coming back today! ((: out with huayshan and cherlyn at marche. havent seen them for so long! my favourite badminton teammates ((: still remember how after trainings on mon wed and fri, we'll gorge ourselves with food at marche and stay out late late. and how we four plus bernie spend valentine's day together and we wanted to buy flowers for each other. haha. miss the two of you! ((:

2006-11-27T13:07:00.000+08:00

yesterday the entire family attended shawn's baptism in holy cross. it was nice seeing him and all the other 105 people and the few babies getting baptised. cant imagine that 17 years ago, i was one of those babies getting baptised. mass was like 2.5 hours long! ! then went to cousin's house and then dinner together. ((: roars im bored now. last night was spent putting in lyrics for all my songs in my ipod. haha partly cause of william tse who tempted me to do that! and once you do quite a few, you'll wanna do for all!so im done with that ((:
roars i havent gone out with a lot of people yet. )): one month more of hols!

3 weeks (: thanks for the past three weeks. though there were so many things that happened, but there are still those happy memories kept within me. i know its been hard on you, but i'll be there for you if you need. thanks for the late night calls, the smses, the countless outings. you made my life a whole lot better. (: love you.

2006-11-25T00:58:00.000+08:00

ended up going to town with bel and shamir today. then we went to borrow books from library! haha what nerds are we! but reading's fun and nice ((: then we walked and walked till we were so tired cause we were looking for the masks for grad night. haha we walked and walked and i had a craving for old chang kee till bel wanted to kill me. then we found masks and the party shop at centrepoint but they were either too ugly, too plain, too expensive. so we walked to spotlight. found plain masks there so we have to paint it. bought those and jason was being nice by coming to us to get the masks and bringing it home to paint it. thanks jason! ((:
talking to shawnlai just now was really nice and comforting. we're such emo kids together! (: its nice to know someone shares the same sentiments about certain stuff and how he shares about what he thinks about certain issues and stuff.its funnny how i knew him in sec 2 yet didnt even speak a word to him in acjc during first three months.anyway thanks a lot shawn! go get your bike soon and then we can go cycling!

When one door of happiness closes,another opens,but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.'
something i found on shawn's blog. i guess we are often held back by the past that we fail to move ahead in life. yet, again its so hard because that happiness was happiness to us in the past and memories are so hard to let go. that happiness once brought us laughter and joy and simple pleasures so now that its gone, we hope to have it again, failing to realise that its gone and we'll never have it again. and since we put so much emphasis on that and fail to release that baggage of ours, we'll never see the new happiness in front of us. thats part of life. i hope i never need to close that door of happiness and keep it within me forever.

i think im an idiot sometimes. ihatemyself. ):

2006-11-23T21:08:00.000+08:00

and so there was council meeting today. briefing on whats gonna happen and all. got splitted into our comms. there's only 3 stage helpers now. )): i hope i dont look retarded on that day moving stuff up and down the stage and doing the games thing. haha luckily i have sheryl and gerard. and now i have to get my dress and in a week ): ANYWAY! town with my favourite people! (((: had a good time talking to them about everything and anything. im so glad i have them ((: though we spent a rather short time together today, but it was good nonetheless. ((:

CARTEL! ((: me shamir sharmaine annabel ((:

to you: good luck for your last paper tmw! ((: finally its come to an end already! ((: love you. ((:

2006-11-22T20:19:00.000+08:00

alrights today's a nice nice day (: except for in the morning.haha mummy was pissed with me cause i couldn wake up and in the end we had to rush like crazy for dental at 9.20. haha she's super funny at those times. then WE WENT TO PERM HAIR! ((: haha a super random thing cause we were deciding what to do so yes there we went! ((: second time perming hair and this time was much longer than the other time cause there were so many people there. haha took a few hours to get it done. then went off to meet the rest of council to watch casino royale ((: havent gone out with council in a long while and i havent seen cartel in a long long while too. my hair looks kinda fake now.. i hope tmw will be better. ((:

CELINE CHOE! thanks for always being there no matter how busy you are with choir and all our monkey friends. im gonna miss you a lot when you leave for prague! )): we'll go out after you come back okay! sorry i cant make it for choir concert!! LOVES! ((:

2006-11-21T23:50:00.000+08:00

justfriends twice in a row. haha but it was good nonetheless. ((: im going off to the dentist early in the morning at 9.20. i hope he doesnt do funny stuff to my teeth. )): anyway WELCOME BACK AMELIA LEE QIU-YAN! (: and get well soon boy! ((: